A Poem? Maybe?

[kato]

A Poem.

Wasted

Remembering a time when everything i knew,

Was a battle to get through, a day to make do,

An hour just to wake you, minutes to injest you,

Hours to enjoy you, days to look forward to,

But in the months i stopped taking you,

A darkness has engulfed me,

Emptiness has got a strong grip on me,

Man staying away is so tough, got me feeling so rough,

Perhaps i'll just use again, but do i know to say enough,

Is it worth all the pain, for absolutely no gain,

Not ready for the risks, and too scared to even exist,

And i'll find myself back where i bagan,

Damn

[Alessandra1992]

Perhaps I'll just try some again..
But do I know when to say enough?
Man staying away is tough
Feeling rough...
Damn maybe not worth the risk....this stuff to injest..
Is it worth my pain?

[kristin]

Well done @kato So much better to speak it out here than act it out.

Take care of you my friend.

I've had a difficult week myself but seeing my psych tomorrow, after having to cancel ECASA today for the Safe Futures house security visit. Hopefully they are going to put in sensor lights around the outside of my house.

Kind regards, 

Kristin

[kato]

@Alessandra1992 

I really liked, what you wrote, i might try and incorporate it into what i have written, i tell you, i had the first bit all sorted, but then i couldn't seem to find how to finish it, but with what you have written i could possibly round it off nicely, if that's ok, it is something i have been working on for a few daysoff and on, and @kristin it is definately better wording something then doing something, i have been told by too many specialists about how fine a line my health is, and that i am not allowed to "dabble" anymore for possible serious repercussions..... still doesn't change my thoughts at the moment, but i am thinking of getting drug counselling, i have no idea if i have mentioned it before, in this thread or another, but eh, the more times i say it the more likely i will actually go through with getting that help.

Hope your not feeling too strung out kristin 🙂

It sounds like a few positives are happening which is fantastic

[PeppiPatty]

I don't have any.........
Friends......
To come over and drink coffee or invite me to see a movie......

But you have somethng that so reminds me of my beautiful son.......
Your interesting
Kind
Acknowledge people and
I have heard that giving up drugs etc. requires you going through a grieving process...............

Think of what you have now????

[peace]

Thank you also @kato Now the stress and pressure is off I am feeling somewhat sad. This loss has triggered my grief from previous losses. It is an opportunity to deal with my saddness I guess. In the past I spent a lot of time running away from my feelings. In my defense they were too overwhelming. So if something comes up that I can sit with I try to do so and honor those feelings. But when it gets to the point that it is damageing well then I need to treat it differently. Emotional pain and suffering has always scared me muchly. I see my psychologist tomorrow .

Kato I really appreciate your support. I do hope that you can be gentle on yourself. And accept the financial help from Centrelink while you take this time to heal and find a management plan.
Bless you sincerely

[kato]

@PeppiPatty@peace 

Hi JA47, thank you for what you have written, i think that it is cool that you see your son in what i write etc, i do find myself going through a griefing type process with stopping using, i sometimes don't recognise it, but it does help when i am reminded of it.

Hi Peace, it is good that you are embrasing your grief from your car and helping yourself with previous other losses, i find that helps for me when i get down, i find myself flooded with grief from past expierences, and it can work like an outlet for other times.

I too get wary of all the emotion involved with grief, it is good that you are also aware of the signs to look for when it is getting too much, how did you go with your psychologist?

I am glad you find my support helpful, and i will try to be gentle on myself, even when i really can't see reason.

Thank you

[Alessandra1992]

Hey @kato
.of course you can use my words or rearrange them...and it sounds as though taking that step to getting drug counselling would be fantastic...let us know how you go...because the turning away is really tricky at times!

[PeppiPatty]

Wow @peace,

This feels like a 'moving on,' message for you........
I mean that you are identifying memories and talking about the deep bit in memories sitting with it and dealing with it positively ( seeing psychologist )

[peace]

No more turning away from the hurt and damn sorrow