My Mosaic

[Bow]

I’ve crawled into bed but my head is buzzing lots of noise

[AuntGlow]

@Bow !! This is SO amazing. How do you feel after having this conversation? I know it's been something that's been on your mind for a while. So I, for one, am very proud of you. 🫶

Thank you for posting pictures of your tiny fur babies, that was going to be my second question - so cute! 🥺💖

[Bow]

You know there is this part of me that’s like… ‘good job, you did well today. You were able to communicate important things about what you need and what helps to make you feel safe’. But then I get slammed with loud mean voices saying .. ‘so what you finally opened your trap and spoke simple words. Big deal. People do that every day. It’s about time you did’. 
So it doesn’t feel nice to feel good about today. And it doesn’t help that I feel so incredibly drained by it all @AuntGlow 

[tyme]

Hey @Bow ,

I've been wanting to update you. I fixed the cricut! Yikes it was fiddly! 27 screws just to get the lid off!

But it's all good now. 

BTW, I saw the post about the kittens!!!

[Bow]

Glad it’s done @tyme  and you can use it again

[AuntGlow]

I completely understand what that inner battle is like @Bow. 

I would like to offer you a reframe: I get the sense this part of you is trying to protect you by keeping you in what's familiar. Because feeling empowered, hopeful, or happy can be really vulnerable when we haven't had a safe space to feel that way. So, I am wondering, what is one thing you could do to gently redirect to a more loving or compassionate space internally? (I know it might feel hard at first, but we are just practicing!) 🥰

[rav3n]

@Bow 

AWW i love that the kitties are named after Taylor's albums!!

also, how's your Thursday going? 😊

[Bow]

I like it too @rav3n   Mumma Taylor was being a bit pesky this morning, kept trying to move them to places I didn’t want them like under cupboards. I put them all in a basket to go weigh them and I turn around and she has one in her mouth heading across the room. Put it back and she grabs another one. Then she had them all in the litter tray 🤨

the rest of my day has been a bit difficult. I had a rough night. Nightmares. And woke to … hmm some medical complications of my ED behaviours. Sigh. Not sure what to do about that. Been playing on my mind all day and of course has affected my mood. It’s like a vicious cycle. 

[Snowie]

I'm sorry to hear today hasn't been great @Bow 

I know not sleeping can affect us so much.

Please take care of yourself, you are worth it.

[rav3n]

haha reading about Mumma Taylor is giving me tom & jerry / looney tunes vibes with how cheeky she is @Bow 

oh gosh, sorry to hear about the nightmares and medical complications. i can see how that would be an overwhelming way to start the day - i wonder if chatting with someone from butterfly foundation might help? or to be safe, maybe contacting your GP or healthdirect for medical advice? it can be hard sitting in the dark about these things hey, hopefully getting some answers can help soothe some of the anxiety. 💙