Lived Experience Forum

[SarahB10-]

I am a survivor of sexual assault. I grew up watching people close to me be drug dependant, last year it resulted in my mother losing her life to drugs and alcohol, till now I still haven't sat with the grief properly, most nights I do cry, some nights I forget my mum even passed, its horrible but I'm not sure, I feel numb to the pain. There will always be a hollow hole in my heart though, I crave emotional attachment, I trauma bonded with someone at the same time my mum passed and I got my heart broken, I felt so dependant when it came to my mental health because he was there to speak to about these things, the traumas of my childhood, my mothers passing, the loss of identity I struggled with. Now that he is no longer apart of my life my mental health has become clearer, some days I have screaming voices in my head, I just want to punch my fists so hard into the wall from all the built up trauma I've endured in my childhood, I never spoke up about it, Im a quiet person and maybe that's why I'm so empty, I have so many questions, so many parts of me that are screaming for help, I don't blame my parents or family members, I know its a continuous cycle but sometimes I just wish they gained enough help too.  

[tyme]

TW: Sexual Assault

It is so brave for you to come out and share what you have shared @SarahB10- . I hear how real and raw these emotions and feelings are for you at the moment. 

I'm sorry to hear you have been hurt in the past. 

Do you have any current supports in place who you can speak to?

At the same time, I am so glad you have connected in the forums here. Hopefully you will feel less alone.

[Angie2023]

@SarahB10- 

Hi....So sorry to hear that...I think that you are on the right track towards healing because you could put your feelings into the words...you already self aware.Not everybody can recognise even their own issues.I am here awake all night if you feel like chatting.

Sending you love and healing.

[NatureLover]

Hi @SarahB10- , welcome...I'm sad to hear about all your trauma 😞

Do you have a trauma-informed counsellor / psychologist to help?

[tyme]

Hi @Angie2023 @SarahB10- ,

How are you both?

[Angie2023]

@NatureLover 

Hi how are you?

Do you know where  could I go to see a counsellor...I can not efford them.Asking too much money for services.

Thanks

[Angie2023]

@tyme 

Thanks for asking....polite answer is great thank you....:(

Searching for a therapist for affordable price...do you know anyone? Or counsellor...I had 10 sessions through the GP but that''s not enough.Not sure where to turn to.?

Thanks

And how are you doing.?Whats in your coping toolbox?

[NatureLover]

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@Angie2023 wrote:

Do you know where  could I go to see a counsellor...I can not efford them.Asking too much money for services.

---

@Angie2023  I see you already have the 10 subsidised sessions per year through the GP...
All I can recommend is that you click on the "Guided Service - Register or Referral" at the top right of this page, run by SANE. 

Good luck...

[tyme]

Hey @Angie2023 ,

I'm not sure if you know, but with the medicare subsided, you can have 10 1:1 sessions and 10 group sessions. Would you consider group sessions?

As for me, in the thick of things, I say a therapist at least once a week. That tapered to once a fortnight, and nowadays, I see a psychologist maybe 2-3 times a year. 

The consistency of care was definitely important when things were so tough for me.

Can your GP suggest any services you can connect with?

[tyme]

Yes, as @NatureLover mentioned, SANE has a Guided Service you may be interested in, as well as a drop-in you can call 10am-8pm on 1800 187 263.