Lived Experience Forum

[MissMuffet]

This week I had my 20th session of TMS for my chronic depression and anxiety. I went into the treatment feeling very hopeful. Yesterday I had my review with my psychiatrist, and sadly things were not looking great. My outcomes (based on questionnaires I've been completing every few weeks) showed I'm actually getting worse. So that was a bit of a kick in the guts. I've been encouraged to see it through till the end, despite the fact that improvement is usually seen by this point. If by 30 sessions (so two weeks time) I still don't show any improvement, it's back to the drawing board.

Bit disappointed and losing hope but I'm ok.

[tyme]

Hey @MissMuffet ,

I'm sorry to hear things haven't seemed to get better.

If we put the questionnaires aside, do you in yourself feel better?

Sometimes, responses collected in a session may not be absolutely accurate. For example, if someone was just having one of those 'bad days', it may affect their responses.

I'm interested to hear what you think.

[hluppy]

@MissMuffet Thanks for sharing this. Sounds very frustrating, particularly when you have rightly invested in your own health. Have there been any options suggested to you by your treating team, if after 30 sessions it hasn't seemed to help? You say you're okay, but I also notice that you say you're losing hope...Is there anything we may be able to help with through chatting on the forum? Keep us updated.

[MissMuffet]

Hi @tyme 

Thanks for the reply 

I think overall I have been feeling worse, more anxious and overwhelmed. Then having those discussions with my nurse and doctor, realising I wasn't seeing the results I wanted made it worse. I've had a lot of ups and downs, and my migraines are flaring up and I'm just feeling like it's all getting a bit much again. It's no where near as bad as in the past, I just know from experience that this is where the downward spiral starts. If I go on like this without doing anything about it, that's when things get bad.

I've spent the weekend allowing myself to rest, hopefully it's enough to get through the following week. 

[tyme]

Please know you are not alone @MissMuffet . I'm sorry to hear they weren't the results you were wanting. 

Go slow and be kind to yourself. We are here to listen.

[MissMuffet]

Hello @hluppy

The doctor said a review of my medications after the 30 sessions. Ironically, I think the TMS might not have been so successful is because going to so many appointments is what stresses me out. I get exhausted easily and driving 20-30 mins each way 4 times a week, on top of work and Tafe plus normal things like grocery shopping or the chemist, I get tired and overwhelmed. I've heard on other forums from people who do TMS that their mood improves in the weeks following treatment. Maybe this will be the case for me as it will be a load off my mind to not have to attend appointments almost every day.

I suppose it's also the fact I have committed so much effort to this treatment that makes me feel so disappointed, it's a lot to go through for nothing. 

Thank you for the questions, sometimes I just need someone else to ask and then I realise how to make sense of my thoughts.

I tend to catostrophise things, the day I originally posted was definitely one of those days! I'm feeling a bit more positive about the rest of the treatment, fingers crossed I'm just a late responder 

[tyme]

I can relate to going to so many appointments and not seeing a difference. I remember the frustration I felt.

I didn't have TMS, but I was going through MBT. I was well into 14 months of therapy twice a week and felt I didn't get anywhere. Towards the end, I noticed a few changes. Then it wasn't until after I was discharged that for the next 6 months, the REAL work was done.... @MissMuffet 

I also asked myself why I was putting in all the effort for treatment, especially as it took a 4 hour round trip each time! 

But I stuck with it, and I'm glad I did.

However, I want to point out again that it was TMS. I'm not sure how TMS works in terms of recovery.

[MissMuffet]

Wowza! 14 months of therapy, now that is commitment