Lived Experience Forum

[greenpea]

 @NatalieS Hi NatalieS sorry to hear that your hubby is still in hospital.... can you take this time to do some self care at home? I can imagine that you are at hospital 90% of the time but it would be a great opportunity to just do something nice for yoursel. Love gp xx

[Former-Member]

hello @NatalieS

thinking of you and sending you wishes for your husband's recovery from his procedure...

yes as @greenpea mentioned....as hard as it is to do...self-care time now ready for when he comes out of hospital..

@Former-MemberI hope that it wasn't me who had written something that made you feel uncomfortable....there..

an example of how many of us on here automatically think that we have upset someone...human reaction sometimes...I too hide as you say...sometimes I don't have the energy to reply or am in the wrong mindset...or am replying to too many and need to step back and give myself some self-care...

I have been on here just over a year I think...when I first joined my head was a mess...I too have long term symptoms of depression..anxiety and some trauma...I am prone to depression which started at an early age...I have moved out of the depression for a period of years in my life and achieved far more than I ever had before....now it comes and goes ...I manage it far better....external situations exasperate my condition though...so I am putting different strategies and personal boundaries in place..

medications I do not like either....for the first major depression.. I had no medication at all and had psychotherapy sessions for 10 years....he was brilliant...great connection...trust...belief...

isolating I do now and am in the throes of pushing myself to get out...problem with me is I move like a racehorse then ...wear myself out...round and around I go..

there is a new thread about goals and checking in....help someone....I loathe techno..that goal has helped me a little and will get back to it...

there is the worry room and walk away...I think that I might have first encountered you there...

good place to just vent...

also a long rave... @Mazarita is a very safe place for me..

we are all different...it has taken me a long time....there are so many personalities and as in real life we click better with some than others...personality styles some of us are very deep like moi and others are more laid back...

enough sorry I write great epics...just wanted to reassure you that you are not alone...I felt terribly alone for quite a while when I first joined..I felt that people were nice...yet I still did not fit anywhere on either side...I did connect with a thread then the person did not come back...

so read...hide...post...vent...laugh...cry...and be amongst people who do genuinely care..many of us have friendships on here now...

all the best...take care...apologies again re the length 

[NatalieS]

Hi gorgeous @greenpea

Can't remember if I mentioned before, hubby has been advised by one of his specialists that it may be two years or less before he's in palliative care ( as he's already been diagnosed with two conditions that there's nothing anyone can do, its just a case of waiting. ) Just spoke to hubby about 30 mins ago...more tests today, including bone marrow biopsy, and everything's come back clear, so we're no further advanced. More tests tomorrow and will find out when he's coming home.  Hubby asked me not to go in visiting as there's nothing we can do except wait, so I phone him in the morning from work and he phones me at night when he's heard from the doctor or specialist.  I've been working most days but I'm really flat this afternoon and my mental health is a bit up and down so I'm trying to be kind to myself. I think I may have a sick day tomorrow and rest as I'm totally beat!  I really need a sleep-in. Hope all is good in your world and you're continuing with the healthy eating and drinking water. Take care and lots of  and hugz. 

[NatalieS]

Hello @Former-Member @Former-Member

Thanks for the kind thoughts.  Can't remember if I mentioned before, hubby has been advised by one of his specialists that it may be two years or less before he's in palliative care ( as he's already been diagnosed with two conditions that there's nothing anyone can do, its just a case of waiting. ) Just spoke to hubby about 30 mins ago...more tests today, including bone marrow biopsy, and everything's come back clear, so we're no further advanced. More tests tomorrow and will find out when he's coming home.  Hubby asked me not to go in visiting as there's nothing we can do except wait, so I phone him in the morning from work and he phones me at night when he's heard from the doctor or specialist.  I've been working most days but I'm really flat this afternoon and my mental health is a bit up and down so I'm trying to be kind to myself. I think I may have a sick day tomorrow and rest as I'm totally beat!  I really need a sleep-in. Hope all is good in your worlds. Take care.

[greenpea]

@NatalieS :)xx

@Former-Member Hi Rob101 have you ventured forth into Forumland?

[Former-Member]

hello @NatalieS

sounds like a day off for you to just think of you is in order...

sleep in...stay in sleepwear all day...keep hydrated if hot where you are...

do whatever soothes you..

no guilt either...remember? we remind each other?

good news re bone marrow biopsy...

my twin gets her results next week along with other test results..

take care

[Former-Member]

Hello @greenpea and friends, Had to step back a bit, The stress of posting caught up with me a lot, but if that's the worst thing this week then it is a great week.

Hey @NatalieS, Bone marrow anything makes me cringe. Good to hear the results came back clear, Hope all went well with the other tests. If you had you day off, i hope it was restful.

@Hi @Former-Member No, no-one has said anything to make me feel uncomfortable(apart from people replying, means they have read what i wrote, that idea is stressful. lol) The whole talking about stuff is a new concept to me, I've always just dealt with everything myself. In the long run it hasn't really proved to be healthy. Up until this year i have only ever slightly talked to 1 person, apart from the doctor years ago.

I understand the automatically thinking we have upset someone. I'm  trying to try and iron out anything that i think might be a miscommunication/misunderstanding. That is a process and a hurdle on it's own. Easier to do with written messages. It probably can be a bit annoying if there isn't one and it's just in my head. I figure if i can work it out then over thinking things can't get on top of me.

Thanks everyone again. The stress of posting has been such a distraction, many other things have been shoved to the back of my mind for now, mostly, kinda. That alone is a holiday in itself.

[Mazarita]

Hi @Former-Member, good to see you around again. I think what you did is wise, to step back when feeling too overwhelmed, and return once you've had a breather. So glad the forum is feeling like a holiday from other things. I too find it so engaging to be able to discuss our issues so freely, most of us making sincere attempts to understand each other's point of view, and clarify our own, it seems to me. I find it a good thing still after being here going on three years. I am also one who finds the written language easier than verbal exchanges. I find it freeing. Hope the evening is kind to you. 

[Former-Member]

Hello @Former-Member

I think that you are doing very well ...such early days...

distraction yes..helpful to release emotions for me..

maxarita is correct in saying knowing when to step back and care for yourself important..

keep on discovering and finding support on here..

[greenpea]

@Former-Member Hi Rob101 I have had to step back on a number of occassions so you are not alone there. It can be overwhelming at times where you just observe and then something triggers you to start contributing again. That is fine. No one here judges you. We are a very accepting crew on the boards so no need for explanations.

I suppose the only time where we all get nervous and worried is if there has been a long silence when the person has wanted to hurt themselves. That has happened a few times and we all get flustered and concerned. Other than that it is fine.

Great to see you back posting though. I hope you have a great day my friend Rob101 🙂