I can’t cope

[AuntGlow]

Well, it sounds like seeing her would be really nourishing for you, so I absolutely encourage you to reach out when you can. @Captain24 🫶

A hot shower and your fake oodie sound perfect! And please treat yourself to something you really enjoy - you deserve it. 

Ah, they are SO cute, and more than enough tasks for the day.

I hope you have a lovely evening, I will be back next week and we can chat more then. 💛

[Captain24]

Have a good weekend @AuntGlow 

Thank you for today. I know I was a bit much but I appreciate the time you spent with me today. 

[tyme]

Aloha! @Captain24 ! Love the LEGO!!!! Howz things? What'd you get up to today?

[Captain24]

Hey @tyme 

Things are a bit tough but you don’t want to hear about it. 

All I did was that Lego. I did some yesterday too. I just did all the new ones I ordered. 

I was suppose to bath the dogs but Jett wasn’t well and I didn’t want to put any stress on him. I was meant to clean the house too but I just couldn’t be bothered. 

How are you going? How’s your post it’s working out for you? 

[tyme]

Hey @Captain24 ,

Sorry to hear it's a bit tough for you. What are some things you are doing to get through it? Anything you can think of that may be helpful?

And poor Jett. What's happened this time? I hope he's okay. What did you do today?

As for me, I've been running around like a headless chook. My brain is everywhere, my place is a mess. 

But meh. I do what I can. 

What are you doing at the moment?

[Captain24]

I had dinner, I’ve had a shower and I’m just watching tv. I also got some silicone coaster looking things with ‘bits’ in them that I’m picking out. I got them from My Sensory Space. @tyme 

My thoughts are just spiralling. I hope that’s ok to say. It scares me to say much, it’s really hard to keep it all in. Last night was really bad. 

He woke me up at about 4 this morning to take him out to the toilet and it just went everywhere. All he did all morning was sleep and didn’t eat. He didn’t have a toy in his mouth (always has something in his mouth!), the dog next door barked and he didn’t lift his head just gave a little growl. Normally he is running up and down the fence trying to get the dog to bark. I gave him some medication and he has been eating and has seemed to have picked up heaps. 

I didn’t do anything other than Lego. I should have finished packing but I did do most of it yesterday so there is t much to go. 

That’s so hard when you just can’t focus. Just so many things running through your head. So many things started and nothing finished.. am I close?? Do you have notes written? Would trying to set a plan help? An accountability buddy? 

Just sitting with Jett watching the Block on tv. They inv not to think. 

[tyme]

Spot on! Starting everything but not finishing everything. For example, I'm 'eating' in my mind, but I actually haven't eaten and I want to go and have food, but I want to stay on the forums... 

Besides that, the thoughts sound hectic. When do you get to speak to your therapist next? 

Also, what is your sensory space? It sounds awesome, safe, comforting.

And Jett! Oh no! Poor him and poor you! It this a Chihuahua thing? They seem to have so many medical needs. From issues with their legs, to stomach to throat. Or is it just Pix and Jett? I remember you saying that some chihuahuas a prone to having s few health issues.

I've only got 2 lists with 1-2 things on each one, so that's totally okay. It's these other projects I have at home that I need a block of time to do, so I'm not packing them up until I've done them... so they are scattered everywhere.

Also, in your other post, you asked me about my "post" "How's your post going?" was this a type, or do you mean post as in my "role"??? @Captain24 

[Captain24]

I so get that @tyme. Complete understanding. It just seems to make so much more sense when you know why your brain is so scattered. 

I see her on the 4th of November. So it’s still weeks away. It’s been weeks since I saw her. All up 8 weeks is a long time to be without anyone. 

My sensory space is an online shop. I get heaps of sensory stuff from there. I even ordered a ‘nee doh’ advent calendar. This thing that I’m picking the bits out of is quite good, they are like really little stones and would look great in a resin coaster, if I ever get back to doing resin! 

Pix just has a sensitive stomach that why she has problems. Jett’s usually pretty good health wise. I think he has only been to the vets once for actually being sick. But yes, they can be temperamental little things! But also I’m on the ball with them so I know when they are off. I know them really well to sense that something isn’t right. I also know what to medicate and when or when they need a vet. Lots of awareness 

Oh that’s tough.. needing to finish before you can pack up. Can you do a little bit each day or does the project need to be done in one whole block? I don’t think I could cope with it everywhere but then that’s the autism I think. Good your work lists are ok though. 

I asked how your ‘post its’ were going! 😂 

[tyme]

Oh! Yes, I've ordered from My Sensory space a few times. I thought you had your OWN sensory space that you go to! Duh! Silly me! @Captain24 

As for the Post-it notes, AH! Another DUH moment. 

Do you see what I mean by how lost I am? I'm totally everywhere but nowhere at the same time. I don't even know the ADHD term for it. 

At this moment, I'm not even going to think about how I'm going to plan things out. I want to fix this Cricuit machine first so I can make my nephew's birthday tackle boxes, then I can clean up my place. His birthday is tomorrow, but we're not doing anything so I bought the tackle boxes for him to give out. I'm just using the cricut machine to put names on the boxes @Captain24 

Between now and 4th Nov, what do you have in place to get through? Is the support group weekly? Also, is there another social catch up?

[Captain24]

I get that. @tyme. It’s like you take things as you read them not the meaning of them. If that makes sense. 

Im so glad I'm medicated as it helps with some of that noise.  The hard thing to is that asd is conflicting with adhd. One is chaos and the other is order! 

Tackle boxes as in fishing? Who does he give them too? That machine is one of those things that does fancy stuff isn’t it?

Nothing at all. The group is weekly but I can’t go every week with work. Last nights was a little better but I’m still unsure. I didn’t talk at all only when I had to read parts. But I did shed a few tears when one lady was talking about childhood and never being good enough. It was just the wrong timing with everything that’s been going on in here and what I shared to give some contact as to why I react the way I do. 

Can I email you tomorrow night when I get home from work? I have a question around a possible member that may know me?